Saturday, June 20, 2009

Happy Father's Day

Well, I'm off the hook this year and probably next year. But at some point, I'm sure before I'm ready, the topic of "daddy" will come up and already my stomach tightens just a little thinking about it.

I am a single mother by choice. I do not know who Radar's biological father is, although I have heard his voice (an audio interview). I have also read everything available about his family, his health, his education, his hobbies, his ethnicity, his personality and his physical characteristics. I have seen a picture of him when he was about 5 years old. And that's likely all I'll get to know for a very long time. When Radar turns 18, he'll have the option to contact his biological father if he wants to...

So that just leaves the next 17 1/2 years for me to contend with when it comes to any "who's my daddy?" questions... I've read all sorts of suggestions as to how to start approaching the topic (as early as now - more for my practice than for Radar's understanding). I like that idea because I don't ever want Radar to be surprised by something in "his story" that was kept as a secret for "his own good." I believe that the truth, without any shame, is best... but that, I guess, is easier said than done and like I said, my stomach already tightens when I imagine a little boy coming home from preschool and asking, "Mommy, why do the other kids have daddies and not me?" Eeek...

Enough of that for now, but I bring it up obviously because today is Father's day and that's a pretty big reminder. And I'll just finish up the topic of Radar's bio-dad by saying that although I don't know who he is, I think about him every day and wish him every good thing that this world has to offer... a stranger has given me the most awesome and precious gift, so Radar and I will celebrate life today in his honor by going to a Humaine Society Father's Day beach barbeque! And yes, Fanny is going too!

I'll leave you with some pictures from yesterday, when mommy and baby spent the whole day together...


Lots of love,
Titi and Radar

PS - Oh, and by the way...

Happy Father's Day Dad!!

2 comments:

The Science Pundit said...

I love the picture where he's wrapped in the towel. :-)

Lizzie said...

Life is full of tricky questions, i am sure you will handle this no problem at all:) Hope you had a happy father's day!!